DNS

Since May of this year, I've run 11 races: 8 on mountain trails (with various degrees of technical ruggedness and elevation variability) and 3 on the road. I am not a fast runner, by a long shot, but I enjoy running in races as a way to keep pushing myself, have something to work towards, and--in the case of the trail races--meet and get to know a fun community of people. (Road races seem to be much less sociable occasions, as far as I can tell from my vast experience of, you know, three.) Distances have ranged from 5k to 25k (a little over 15 and a half miles), including a road half marathon last month. To my surprise, I actually much prefer the longer distances. To my even greater surprise, I really hope to get into ultrarunning once I gain more experience. "50k by 50" is my aim.

Various things have happened on these races. I've dealt with stomach ails, from mild queasiness to oh-my-god feeling like I'm going to puke constantly. I think I may have managed one or two trail races without falling, but i almost always end up with at least a mild bruise or scrape. On one memorable occasion, I took a couple of pretty spectacular falls that led to a lateral foot sprain, massive bruises on my left hip/thigh and shoulder, scraping so severe it left scars, and a general feeling of having been hit by a car.

A couple of times I've come very close to DFL (Dead Fucking Last). But I've never dropped (knock wood), and I've always shown up. Until now.

Tomorrow, I will have my first DNS. Did Not Start. In the hierarchy of running acronyms and jargon, it occupies the most reviled position. What kind of lazy scoundrel doesn't even bother to show up?
This kind, I guess.

Tomorrow, I was supposed to be running my second half-marathon, about six weeks after my first. I had fantasies of training hard, and trouncing my own PR (Personal Record, although in this case it's a Personal Only). I did run a pretty challenging 12k trail race in mid-November, but since then I have hardly gone out at all. My training is down, I have had minimal sleep in well over a week (last night I went to bed... this morning at nearly 5 am). This half isn't happening. I'm just going to have to resign myself to the fact that life sometimes gets in the way, finish grading (please, please let me finish grading soon!), and then start back up with a plan.

I kind of hate it, but reality doesn't really care how I feel about the situation.